How to Survive a Long Distance Relationship
If you are in a long distance relationship—or going to be at some point—these are the top ten most important tips to follow that will keep the love alive.
A long distance relationship (LDR) is far, far away from easy, but if you can make it through the distance, you feel like conquering pretty much anything after that together.
These ten tips are beneficial to any long-lasting relationship, but they are VITAL to long-lasting long distance relationships.
I wish I could take credit for coming up with all of these on my own, but I did get some help from my better half. I can’t speak for the both of us, and I surely can’t do everything alone! Therefore, these are what we—a couple with almost 3 years of dating down, and about one year of that being states apart—believe are the best possible tips anyone could consider before taking it to this step.
The biggest part of a LDR is learning how to communicate. We are so fortunate in today’s age to have access to services such as FaceTime and iMessage, allowing us to talk to our significant others (S/Os) at pretty much any given moment. Since letters, texts, calls, emails, etc. are the closest thing we have to “together time”, it is highly important to take advantage of these opportunities to replace lost face-to-face interaction.
2. Stay trusting.
This is also a HUGE step. You are not with your partner nearly as often as you used to be. You might not hear from them as often, either. If you are willing to trust that your partner is making faithful decisions and you are also receiving trust and confidence back, then consider it a blessing to be on the same page.
3. Show Loyalty.
You can’t expect to earn trust without being loyal. If you are honest about everything with your S/O, experiencing trust issues is rare.
4. Be fair.
Don’t do anything that you wouldn’t want your partner doing to you. If you are already questioning whether or not certain decisions you might make could cause your partner to be upset, it probably isn’t a good idea. Always try to picture yourself in the opposing position.
5. Set Expectations.
To accumulate all the tips so far, setting expectations before you even begin the long distance is essential. This will make it so much simpler when you are figuring out the best ways to communicate, when to communicate, what loyalty means to you, and the like.
6. Value time.
Depending on how often you see each other or hear from each other, the time you do get together is precious. Don’t waste it on arguments—instead, cherish it and make the best of the time you have.
7. Remain Involved.
When we are seemingly worlds apart, my boyfriend and I often get so caught up in our own lives that we forget to ask what’s new. Make effort to catch up on things that are occurring in the life of your partner, and don’t disregard filling him or her in on yours.
8. Be innovative.
Just because you are apart, doesn’t mean you can’t have anymore dates or plan fun activities. Watch movies “together”, have FaceTime dinner dates, play online games… come up with creative ways to keep things exciting.
9. Embrace your independence.
Perhaps this is the first major time you’ve been without your better half. Instead of feeling alone, appreciate the fact that you are learning how to do things on your own and growing as an individual. As long as you are creating a firm foundation of yourselves, it promotes healthier growth together.
10. Practice patience.
You might get easily frustrated with each other because you are not talking often or seeing one another. It is key to keep in mind what lies ahead—even a countdown to the next time that you see each other can help ease the discontent. Focusing on the future will remind you why you chose to be in a LDR in the first place. You have to believe the wait is worth it.
When you finally get to reunite with your significant other, the dynamics may feel a little different then you remember. Don’t be scared! This is normal, because depending on how long you were apart, you can both undergo many individual changes without being a firsthand witness to these. It still doesn’t replace the people who you are together, and if you are dedicated enough to making your relationship work, these changes won’t have significant impact on your overall connection. In fact, this makes the two of you stronger because you learn to love who you are both becoming.